RATLIFF 35/2012

williebhines:

This is a 55 minute press conference for presidential candidate Connor Ratliff. It was attended by 3 members of the press and myself. I was attacked mercilessly throughout this press conference. I am offended by that. I will continue to attend every campaign event as a form of protest.

Highlights:

12:15 - by wearing a suit, he has declared that he is a candidate

16:37 - Connor’s “Final Solution” for the immigration problem

20:45 - “I’m 35 with a little tax. Wait, no…”

24:30 - Connor calls Dan Quayle a “Dummy” and then talks about Murphy Brown

26:10 - acting out getting a phone call at 3am

28:45 - his political experience; also mouthing the word “f*ck” is not the same as saying it out loud.

33:00 - Connor’s “kill list.” I am on this list.

37:00 - “I’m not taking the bait, I’m catching the fish. You’re the fish.”

40:30 - Summer reading list, which includes “the internet.”

45:00 - Off the record. “Don’t fuck me.” 

53:00 - Tough questions.